You may substitute the name for one of your own local cock-spots.
Dear Sir's,
???I have just had a great night in your venue but just a few things have been getting on my nerves.
???How the fuck are you supposed to speak to the DJ when the DJ box is behind the bar. I quite clearly asked for Betty Boo several times, I don't want to have to rely on bar staff to be my go between.
???Carpets, lads they stink, lets be honest they need ripping up & burning.
???Toilets. It wouldn't fucking kill you to put a new (working) lock on each cubicle would it? Toilet seats?? Where the fuck are they?? I went in the women's toilet and some poor fag hag had put layers of toilet paper round and around x 10, by the time I got there the toilet tissue was all damp. It all looked like some kind of dirty wilted lily. I mean how much does a toilet seat cost for christ sake, we are no peasants.. As for the downstairs loos, well, the gents has one cubicle blocked permanently, and the ladies have light fittings coming out of the wall.
???The dancefloor downstairs is warped. Several times I put it down to drugs, but no it's up & down. Get someone in to look at it.
???Really it's just general good housekeeping. Stop cutting corners and sort it out.
???It's a fucking disgrace.
???I thank you
Stevo
PS See you next Monday!!!
[Rubbish music on: Love Me For A Little While - Janet Jackson ]