After double dropping, rubbish gays found itself coming up on a certain Legendary dancefloor in Manchester. Gleaming under the neon in best scally white trackies, top & bling. A glorious time was anticipated and expected. Then THE rubbish gay was outflanked by genuine rubbish gays!!
In a scissor movement, they appeared. To the right a skinhead bottom (braces down, denotes status). His movements can best be described as 'imagine Erasure's Andy Bell's as a marionette, then imagine the puppeteer is tripping'. As the smoke bean to pump out from the DJ box from the left came the second wave. Jumpers are not normally club wear but that didn't stop this sad old Father Dowling impersonater & his young bespectacled asian assistant. As the rush came, so did they, flailing their arms and legs around like Helen Keller. In the words of the diva on at the time 'Absolutely not!!'. Rubbish gays ran off to a dark corner until could not see hand in front of face.
In other news, we tried but couldn't be arsed to bring back a scally chicken. He mocked our dancing to 'Rhythm of the night', don't blame us, the 90's were a very different time. Our next batch of dirty cash arrives tomorrow. Just in time for Cruz 101. Pass the poppers....
[Rubbish TV on: Michael Jackson & the boy he paid off - BBC Three ]