I Closed My Eyes (I Closed My Eyes), Drew Back The Foreskin...arrr ah
Honeytom has done me a favour. Look at these pictures above you, blot out the face first, it helps. OK mmmm not bad. Now remove thumb. Urgh!! Yes its 'H' from Steps appearing in 'a twit and his technicoloured cunt'. See now this is a lesson for all wanna be gym queens, you can so have the perfect body, but if the face is that of Fu-Manchu's Poop Chute it's not going to make one bit of difference.
Ian 'H' Watkins you stand accused of being a Rubbish Gay of the highest order. How do you plea??
Damned lies. You had a crap haircut for years and it just got drapper. In your time with Rebel Faction known as S.T.E.P.S. you made nervous queens sniff too much poppers on provincial dancefloors up and down the country. Your outfits were poor consisting mainly of shiny top & shorts set. You are useless at singing, that Claire is well rid of you. She's one hag who doesn't need a fag. Now you attempt to follow in the footsteps of Jason Donavan (or J.Do), Phillip Schofield & Donny Osmond. 'I Look handsome I look smart I look like a total twat'.
H:All true I change my plee..
Too late!! Off with his head. Take him down!!
Postscript: With a bag on his head we would do him, but still be concerned about colour of pubic hair.
[Rubbish TV on: The Wicker Man - Channel 4 ]