One From The Anals

The names have been changed to protect the stupid.

sad_gay.com_wanker>> hi there
sad_gay.com_wanker>> what r u lookin 4?
>> hello there sad_gay.com_wanker
>> hang on, I need to look at your profile
sad_gay.com_wanker>> ok
>> no picture, thats a bad start
sad_gay.com_wanker>> sorry sir
sad_gay.com_wanker>> i have to be careful
>> are you not gay?
sad_gay.com_wanker>> i am gay
>> you dont sound it
>> do you know who H & Claire are?
sad_gay.com_wanker>> :) no :))
sad_gay.com_wanker>> steps
>> then maybe I am not the boy for you
sad_gay.com_wanker>>> u r
sad_gay.com_wanker>>> what r u lookin 4?
>> rubbish things
sad_gay.com_wanker>> like...?
>> and drugs
sad_gay.com_wanker>> cant help u there sorry sir
>> whats the 'sir' thing about?
sad_gay.com_wanker>> im active but i luv to be dominated
>> oh god what a bore
sad_gay.com_wanker>> oh well i tried
sad_gay.com_wanker>> sorry for wasting ur time
>> does it mention anywhere on my profile that Im into that?
>> you're twisting my melon man
sad_gay.com_wanker>> no but i can always hope
>> Hope died in a tragic boat accident
>> she caught her pashmena in the rotors
sad_gay.com_wanker>> :))
>> goodbye sad_gay.com_wanker
sad_gay.com_wanker>> take care
sad_gay.com_wanker>> bye
>> no you hang-up
sad_gay.com_wanker>> why me?
>> I don't like to be rude
>> besides
sad_gay.com_wanker>> u can be as rude as u want to me
>> 'sad_gay.com_wanker has left private chat'
has a sense of finality about it.
sad_gay.com_wanker>> :))
>> I see you like Ground Force
sad_gay.com_wanker>> yep
>> and are a novice bird-watcher
>> a twitcher they call them
sad_gay.com_wanker>> i believe so but only a beginner
>> do you have a fat ball?
sad_gay.com_wanker>> ?
>> its made of fat & seeds, put them in the garden
>> bluetits love them
sad_gay.com_wanker>> oic not now
sad_gay.com_wanker>> :))
>> (I won't be abusing you now by the way)
sad_gay.com_wanker>> :(
>> but I do hate emoticons
>> you could drive a man to beat you
sad_gay.com_wanker>> sorry
sad_gay.com_wanker>> lol
>>I see you also like Changing Rooms
>>I'm starting to see a pattern
sad_gay.com_wanker>>hope its not leading anywhere
[Mon Jul 28 00:32:47 GMT 2003] Disconnected.

[Rubbish TV on: Big Brother - Channel 4 ]

The Gay After Tommorrow ('s porn)

'Show me a gay man that doesn't wank, and I'll show you stiff sheets' . We have readers, performed this deed both with others and in private. Of course the latter is preferred, but frankly who has the time. Enter porn. Not just any porn for rubbish gays mind!! Scallies, Neds, Chavers, working, dirty handed, reflective jacket & rigga boot wearer lads are fit, it's official. However in the porn department lovers of rough trade have been rather short changed. Having to deal with skinny Eastern European boys, and white socked Bel Ami twink twats for masterbatory purposes for far too long. Give us junkie dole scum trackie wearers, and a quality spunk-up session is assured. Enter Triga, they bring you men/lads from the street/estate/gutter/cottage into YOUR living room/bedroom. Just a brief flick over some of the titles available gives one no mistake about what R18 bang you get for your pink pound. 'Straight Men Fuck', 'Fireman Wankers' or 'Fucking Footballers', Rubbish Gays has a semi-on just reading the titles. Unfortunately we have downloaded
watched 'Trackie Lads', it's shite. However 'Football Orgy Two' hits the back of the net (wank sock), many, many times.
In conclusion, gay porn is changing for the better, and we have never wanked so much since we were 15 & on holiday. Click here to buy you some porn & get me some commision!!
PS If anyone at Triga reads this we would love a preview copy of 'Council Estate Europe', purely for masterbation purposes only.

[Rubbish DVD on: Atlantis:The Lost Empire ]

Snap, Crackle, Poppers!!

Product warning!! It has come to us from several sources that the lids on current poppers bottle are like Dannii Minogue's career, very fragile. Imagine if you will, a homosexual entertainment venue. The WKD is flowing, you've got a glow band, then Cher comes on. Fab!! Get the poppers out!! Ooh sniff *bleargh* Cap back on quick afore the rush cums. Then *break/snap*, the top of the lid comes off in your hand. FUCK!! Too late now, thumb on top, feel the music, hot, sweaty, rubbish. When the pink mist clears you look down. 'What am I going to do now?', lucky for you we have those hints you need.

Top Tips For Popped Off Poppers
- Keep thumb over top at all times
- Don't stop movin'.
- Pass among freinds/strangers. Share the wealth.
- Accept that you will need to get another bottle.
- Get in 'the zone'.
- If desperate, chew a large piece of gum. Push in top of bottle.
- Tell your retailer!!

[Rubbish TV on: Charmed - LIVINGtv ]

American Bandwagon

Now that gay marriages is potentially available to gays/lesbos. A whole new raft of 'pink' services is coming available. Have a look at this though for plain cheek. This shifty baldie is a lawyer who 'specializes' in gay divorces. Funny that since it barely exists. Anyhow, if you did get legally married and you want a divorce, look at his face, could you trust him? Thought not. Serves you right for wanting to exit the most sacred of vows.

[Rubbish TV on: Big Brother - Channel 4 ]

The Picture Of Dorien Gay

There's something about Marco....

[Rubbish TV on: Probably Big Brother - Channel 4/E4 ]

One Fine Gay

The rancidity that is Porn Idol *gag* is back. The final is at the rubbishest gay club in Little Britain, G-A-Why-Oh-Why. Hosted by our very own Brian Dowling. Last years prize was some Clone Zone Vouchers, a part in a porn film, and some poppers, not a clue what this years lucky winner will get. Apart from being fuck up the ass of course.

As can be seen by this tacky .gif, they all bow down Emperor Ming of Mongo. If we EVER saw porn staring any of these hounds it would rape our eyes. Of course if you are one of the Porn Idolists please do write in. We would love to hear from you. Mail to usual address.

[Rubbish music on: Love Comes Again -Tiesto featuring BT]

Smear/Queer Campaign

Hi, I'm Jason from the Big Brother house. I'm not gay. That's me in the first picture bending over for a gay housemate (I'm not gay). There I am in the second, mounted on top of the same housemate. He's gay, but I'm not. Did I say that already? The last picture, just a bit of fun, nothing remotely poofy going on there. Did I mention I'm training to be an air steward? One more thing, I'm not gay.

[Rubbish TV on: Soylet Green - BBC 1 ]