Wednesday, April 14, 2004

Available in All the Colours of the Speculum ...Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Learned to Love the Flag

The rainbow flag, it's big, not clever therefore obviously an American invention. If the fag flag were invented here the memory and horror of the kids TV show 'Rainbow' would have put a full stop to that!! On a Rainbow note, Zippy, George, etc have been doing the pissed up student venues ie Popspastic. Stand clear, 'Rainbow' and its shoddy merchandise should be avoided at all costs. Which brings us back to the rainbow flag. Invented some time ago by A Gay & I M Juan Too (with the aid of the mice on the mouse-organ while Bagpuss slept), todays flag can be found in most Clone Zone's, rough or local gay pubs and on wall of single queens rented room.

Between the last paragraph and this we got curious to know our roots, so we did some snooping. The flag was invented by a man (yay men!), whose name is amusingly Gillbert, see him here!! Seems a printing problem in its early stages means we were deprived a treat of a flag with a 'hot pink' stripe/length.

To the issue in hand. When the Freedom Flag remains in its place, up a pole, up a Czech, etc it is garishly annoying, gay but not rubbish. However, gay shopkeepers are always on the look out for new 'homo-winning lines', as poppers, jizz mags, & cock rings are clearly just loss-leaders. This is where it all goes wrong. The flag, unlike the Spice Girls, has no copyright and as such appears appears on some shit. Buyer beware!!

A housecoat by any other name...Dressing gowns CAN be cool
Gay leather has never been so unappealingYou'll look a right gay in this leather!!
The (brown) Stars & StripsBe American, proud AND rubbish at the same time
Where is the rainbow tabard??Perfect for Martika's (Navratilova's) kitchen, baby
Talk about 'wipe your feet'Rug burns!! lets burn this horror
Tickled fancyYou don't have to be a gay cunt to wear this, but it helps


All that glitters is not gold, and all that shit stuff has not been sold. Find it, and more jizz junk here perfect gifts for the blind & gay dads.

Mighty Rainbow flag, Rubbish Gays salute you!! May you flutter in all your beauty, like a butterfly sat on a gay friendly flower. May you be only washed once a year, prior to Annual Pride Event. Flag, like smelly cat, we know, it's not your fault *sniff*.

PS The flag is still not as shite as the little fish symbol Christians stick everywhere.

[Rubbish TV on: The Bill - ITV 1 ]