Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Uh oh She's Got A Storyline Again....


They say that the best gays have no gag reflex, which accounts for our ability to do excellent deepthroat. This is true on the whole, except when it comes to Anthony Cotton. Gag-reflex or not he is enough to make even the most macho macho man puke in their handbag.

Yes one of our favorite rubbish gayers has been given a storyline on Coronation Street!! For the Helen Keller types out there we have highlighted the most unlikeliest aspect of this whole charade. There's going to be a Mr Gay Weatherfield? What the fuck? Are the writers on LSD? This is how Sean is supposed to meet the new love of his life? We apologise for all the question marks but what the fuck? Let's think.... Mr Gay Weatherfield, it's a bit like Mr Gay Salford, ain't gonna happen. We assume either Sean enters the competition or goes out with the winner of the competition. FYI Point 1, there are NO gays in Weatherfield. Point 2, Sean Tully is a reet hound, by which we mean ugly. Pointer Sisters aside this looks like the most barf making storyline since Deidre slept with Dev.

On a positive note. There maybe some local hunks on, and we all like to see big gays in our soaps. We are only hoping Blanche gets a big part in this upcoming travesty. We feel Blanche Hunt always brings a sense of realism to the table. Hold on, Anthony Cotton is on Twitter? We bet that is a laugh a minute. We will sign up for updates. This looks as if it could be pure gold!

Thursday, February 19, 2009

What Have I Done To Deserve Chris?



Quite why Neil was a chess piece and Chris was a dead ringer for Britney/Anne Robinson we may never know. However as previously imagined the Pet Shop Boys at the Brits was a real extravaganza! Apart from the bit when we heard Dusty Springfield turn in her grave as Lady Gaga JUST DANCED over it (all day all day).

We will do more on this article tommorrow we promise.

Friday, February 06, 2009

All Gay All Gay, Watch Them All Fall Down (Domino Dancing)



We fucking love the Pet Shop Boys. We don't care if Chris Lowe has never come out cos we would still let him bum us stupid (I'm with). Look above to see the sleeve for their forthcoming elpee 'Yes'. We were wanking ourselves silly waiting for their last album but it was a bit of a disappointment. Even with Trevor Horn at the helm it just didn't hit the spot. However 'Yes' according to all sources promises to be a spunkfest of pop, which is nice, something to look forward to.

Neil & Chris are getting the Outstanding Contribution To Music Award at this years Brit Awards and we here at Rubbish Gays couldn't be any prouder. At every step of our rubbish gay lives the PSB's have been there. The amusement of asking for "Please please", then "Actually please" at our local record emporium back in the day still brings a comedy tear to our japs eye. Their seminal work Results with Liza Minelli helped us through a very troubled time when we were at that difficult age.

In conclusion, Neil Tennant and Chris Lowe, we bow before you, we would also suck you off but that's a different story. Our seat will be moist to say the least when you take to the stage on the 18th. We have also ordered extra ketamine in. GAWD BLESH YOUZ!! *salutes*

Friday, December 26, 2008

Nice Girls Don't Wear Cha-Cha Heels


Fuck Julie Newmarr, fuck Lee Meriwether. Eartha was THE Catwoman back in the gay (out of interest Michelle Pffifer played the best Selina Kyle, and don't let me get started on Hally Berry's abortion job). Alas Miss Kitt has been stolen from us by a cruel God *shakes fist* NOT ON CHRISTMAS!!

We at Rubbish Gays salute Eartha, a camp goddess if ever there was one. We have in our collection a thick 12" of Cha-Cha Heels-Bronski Beat feat. Eartha Kitt. This record sits in the top 10 of our Gayest Songs In The World Ever... As such we will be digging out our viynal this evensong and be sniff poppers like there's no tommorrow. It's all for you Miss Kitty Kat. *sniffs*

On a different note we should really get off our arse and do a Diva Death Watch site. Ya know they are all knocking on a bit, but are we really prepared for one of our beloved idols to kick the bucket? There was a close call last year when Dame Shirley nearly did a Mike Smith in theat helicopter. *Phew* So Close like Dina Carroll. Look out for the new blog if/when we can stop getting into K-holes.

In conclusion Eartha Kitt we will miss you *squish squish*. Though wouldn't it be fabulous if she gets cremated so she too can 'hurry up the chimney tonight'.

Amen

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

When Santa('s Cock) Got Stuck In The Chimney


Observe.

Like Our Lord baby Jesus, Rubbish Gays aren't just born we are made that way.

The pictorial representaions above may give you an insight into our Christmases past. Yes, the 80's was a very different time.

Thursday, December 04, 2008

It's Official!! No means yes!!



An early seasonal cheery headline from the Leigh & Atherton Journal. Well done guys, like last posting dates an extra batch of GBL can sometimes be over looked. So plenty of time to stock up and 'practice' spiking fit lads drinks.

The Golden (shower) Girls


One of our freinds has just come back from Miami. Yeah innit. Not only that but he went to see Madonna 'Ooh smell her'. As we all know rubbish is as rubbish does. He left his wallet on the plane lost all his bux deluxe and bang went our chances of a new pair of Levi 501 Button fly W32 L34. Drat!

I did get you something though...

Er

See above picture.

A fridge magnet.

A FUCKING FRIDGE MAGNET!!

This ain't over by a long shot, we are emailing Shady Pines right after this post.