Saturday, September 06, 2003
Friday, September 05, 2003
Ask Not For Whom The Toilet Rolls...
'Makes a great and unusual gift, good for a laugh every time!' Is the jaunty strap-line for this 'item'. My freind used to have one with a radio & ash-tray on top.
'Installs in seconds... years of fun!'
Oh I am quite sure the joke wears thin very quickly.
[Rubbish music on: Sundown - S Club 8 ]
Thursday, September 04, 2003
Like A Prayer
Whilst browsing for offensive homo material I came across Betty Bowers. In one article she tips off other Baptists on how to spot a fag:
'Outside of Italian shoes, nothing sends up a rainbow-colored flare that you are dealing with a flaming homosexual more reliably than when a man breathlessly gushes the word "faaabulous!"'
In Manchester a way to spot a gay is to look out for the extra 'S' . This can be applied to most names, Eg Cruz 101 becomes Cruzes, Essential becomes Essentials, Manto Mantos, etc.... Not limited either to place names. For further info, please see Cheeky Girls and the top 3 hit 'Take your shoeses off'.
Two city centre gems in two minutes
As I was crossing Oldham Street today a man started to cross over with his dog. I noticed then the dog had only 3 legs, missing one of the front ones. This is not the amusing part. Standby. He called to the dog, "come on Ivor". Ivor 3-legged dog. How does it smell?? etc
There was a girl in front of me in the Superdrug queue. From behind I could see she had a pack of refill blades for Gillette lady razor things, but when she put her stuff down on the counter she had 2 boxes of condoms too. Maybe tonight was her lucky night. Fuck me though it cost her over a tenner!! The NOT rubbish thing about going to gay pubs & clubs, is the free condoms. I haven't had to pay for condoms for near 10 years now. I hope this sensible girl had a good time & got real VFM.
As I was crossing Oldham Street today a man started to cross over with his dog. I noticed then the dog had only 3 legs, missing one of the front ones. This is not the amusing part. Standby. He called to the dog, "come on Ivor". Ivor 3-legged dog. How does it smell?? etc
There was a girl in front of me in the Superdrug queue. From behind I could see she had a pack of refill blades for Gillette lady razor things, but when she put her stuff down on the counter she had 2 boxes of condoms too. Maybe tonight was her lucky night. Fuck me though it cost her over a tenner!! The NOT rubbish thing about going to gay pubs & clubs, is the free condoms. I haven't had to pay for condoms for near 10 years now. I hope this sensible girl had a good time & got real VFM.
[Rubbish music on: Booty Call - All Saints ]
Monday, September 01, 2003
When Flags Attack!!
Calm down dear, it's only a commercial.
I can almost see him now, tears rolling down his face, fag ash all over the keyboard & an empty box of wine.
[Rubbish music on: I Don't Know what You Want But I Can't Give It Anymore - Pet Shop Boys ]
Interview Game II
The Rules
1. Leave a comment, saying you want to be interviewed.
2. I will respond; I'll ask you five questions.
3. You'll update your website with my five questions, and your five answers.
4. You'll include this explanation.
5. You'll ask other people five questions when they want to be interviewed.
Here are five from Truman
1. If you were a show pony, who would be your jockey?
Jockey Wilson, maybe Jack from Will & Grace, he looks light enough.
2. Who is the reigning queen of pop?
Well Madonna doesn't make pop music anymore, obviously then its Kylie.
3. Where is your 'happy place'?
In a K-hole with the Human League on.
4. Polo Smoothies or Campinos?
Er Campinos, even though I know they are a girls sweet.
5. Name your 5 desert island items?
Time-machine, Sky One, Rizlas, Alistair Appleton & a fairly large cock.
Send me a mail if you want in on this (agreed) sad game.
The Rules
1. Leave a comment, saying you want to be interviewed.
2. I will respond; I'll ask you five questions.
3. You'll update your website with my five questions, and your five answers.
4. You'll include this explanation.
5. You'll ask other people five questions when they want to be interviewed.
Here are five from Truman
1. If you were a show pony, who would be your jockey?
Jockey Wilson, maybe Jack from Will & Grace, he looks light enough.
2. Who is the reigning queen of pop?
Well Madonna doesn't make pop music anymore, obviously then its Kylie.
3. Where is your 'happy place'?
In a K-hole with the Human League on.
4. Polo Smoothies or Campinos?
Er Campinos, even though I know they are a girls sweet.
5. Name your 5 desert island items?
Time-machine, Sky One, Rizlas, Alistair Appleton & a fairly large cock.
Send me a mail if you want in on this (agreed) sad game.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)