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Rubbish Gays

Gay is the new black, but rubbish is the new brown.

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Salad Gays

Sometimes in our sexual life we are presented with strange choices. For instance, what do you do in the bed when trade puts a cucumber in your hand? It's no joke, we have been in this position on Friday night. First we laughed, then we put it down. Within 5 minutes we had cleared the building and were racing home.

Never again?!

Three weeks later. Different trade. We hadn't even got to bumming, and he's reaching into the draw for a hot pink dildo. With one hand and a quick movement, dildo trade has lubed it up and shoved it up his ass. Within 5 minutes we had cleared the building and were racing home.

What is wrong with you lads?!? Hmmm?!?! We have a largish cock, it's not as big as a cucumber but its bigger than hot pinks sex toy. It's almost an ass opener, but lately it's been under used. Why does our trade want to waste it in leau of an inanimate object. Who can say? Men are odd, but we can't help loving them *sniff*.

This homo don't play that. So stick yer butt plug/love beads/carrot up yer arse, but don't call us to do it. You sick and jealous perverts.

[Rubbish music on: Eve of the War (Tom Middleton mix) - jeff wayne ]


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Poofs, eh?

I've bin shaggin 'em for 'arf a loiftoim an I still dun unnerstand any of 'em.

This way up, that way up, waddayalikedoin?, no not till oim ready, do this, do that, wear leather, rub rubber, not there here, youwontellthewifewillya, haveucumyet?

Per-lease, boyz. Frankly, a wank would have done just as well.

Yrs, Solitaire.

1:37 am  

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