Last Night

Rubbish Gays dreamt he was in the back of a stationary car, with an old woman on one side, an old man on the other and being sucked off by the dark haired one from t.AT.u. Has this rubbish gay become a rubbish lesbian? Research continues, this may only be a one-off.....

[Rubbish music on: Wigan Pier - Get A Life You Drug Addicts - ]

Slow down get cheeky with me


Rubbish gays has much respect for these Transylvanian Lollypops, but even we cannot turn the other cheek on this one. Back out for Christmas its Partytime. I should start with the cover really. It's piss poor. Both the girls seem to be having a Linda Barker Currys moment, keep them away from sharp objects. The background serves to add to the horror, while the star in the corner makes it shabby. Eagle eyed readers will be able to make out it contains 'Cheeky Christmas', what is this madness?? As for the rest of the content, a bit like a Talking Heads album this is very hard going. May you never find yourselves never at this party!!
Head off to their website to see them cutting a birthday cake, but not actually eating any of it. It appears they turned 21 on hallowe'en, spooky or gimmick, you decide.

[Rubbish music on: russia2003 - t.a.t.u. ]

Darren Osbourne -Cocky Fuckwitt




Brookside is behind us. All that is ahead is Hollyoaks, look to the future now... Darren Osbourne, who knows or cares what his real name is but he's a nasty piece of work. He was a twat then and he's a twat now, and frankly it's fouling up 'The Dog in the Pond'. Luckly for him he is well fit, and as such needs this sly streak knobbing out of him. As there is only one gay in Chester, and he's a weed, Rubbish Gays puts itself forward for this hard task. Details on Darren's bringing down to earth with a gay bump here, if and when it happens.

[Rubbish music on: maximum overdrive - 2 unlimited ]

A Blind Eye For The Straight Guy



Oh the humanity!! Topman's latest attempts to dress the men of our great nation have fallen sadly short of all estimates. I present to you a selection of clothes that go not only against all nature, but they defy the very laws of the colour wheel.
Look again at the jumper in the middle, this kind of woollen nightmare can be found in every students middle draw. It comes out at the first sign of cold, and normally has a hole at the bottom of each sleeve to accommodate a thumb.
Purple shiny pants (see fig.3), not since Prince's Purple Reign have I seen such unnecessarily grape coloured pantage. What do these pants say about the wearer? I suspect they say 'Even the only gay in the village would not wear these britches'.

[Rubbish TV on: Burn It - BBC Three ]

Prince Charles, rubbish gay??



At the risk of sounding treasonous, Prince Charles has been accused of having cock & ball fun with his 'closest advisor', who I assume is a fag. Of course Charlie boy says he's not a dirt-box devil, but he did turn down the lovely Diana for fag-hagish Camilla. You don't have to be Dannii Minogue to begin to wonder.

Here is the article, its a crap translation, but well worth it for the amusing grammar and word substiutions:

The king house risks everything that it knows this keeping secret, since on it allegedly explosive material is to be over the Sexualleben of prince Charles.

Er did Fawcett approximate too, but which I can make, if my married man an unhealthy relationship wanting with an official is received??

[Rubbish TV on: India's Ladyboys - BBC Three ]

A thousand and one wanks



Have the gay version of the Proclaimers bitten off more than they can chew? The million pound property experiment started tonight, in fact it's on right now. It is a temple to all that is gay & rubbish. Even the straight roughnecks on the programme seem to demonstrate more common sense & design tips than these pair. I suspect they secretly ridicule these two, not for being gay, but for one having a funny lip and the other being Lorraine Kelly. Either way this looks like required viewing over the next few weeks. I bet Colin is 1st to cry.

"We don't want any Victorian's telling us how to use our space" Too right Colin!! (or is it Justin?)

[Rubbish TV on: The Million Pound Property Experiment - BBC 2 ]

RIP



Last Brookside tonight. No excuse for not watching it.

[Rubbish TV on: Wife Swap - Channel 4 ]