Happy Rubbish (Christmas Gays)

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Our Mother has just been for her Christmas visit. Bless her for her presents. We could be in our 40s. Her presents included a Marvel desk calendar & a Marvel dressing gown. Great gifts for a comic book lover. As previously mentioned we are older. We like DC Comics, we hate Marvel. Rubbish Gays put the gown on, hood too. Thank you Mother.

Our sister went out & brought us back 20 cigarettes. Gawd blesh yer.

For The Twatty Hipster Who IS Everything

We Rubbish Gays hate hipsters. Our main point of contention today is represented by the above picture. Beard fucking Baubles. We first noticed the item in an email. We believed it was genuine but a little 'padded' as a gift. We then took a look. Oh my!! There is a range. We say 'range', in other words, more of the same. As you can see from the illustration, it's not a real beard. It's not a real person. In fact it just a female shop mannequin with old pubes stuck to it.

On a sidenote. These look AWFUL. Even if you are buying a treat for the hipster type. Do not buy these. Please.

Girls Rule. Women Are Funny, Bebe, Get Over Yourself, Seriously

[UPDATED 18/08/17]

'Funny women'(Sorry Babs, not you) as a type has been on the fence with us for a while. It is only this evensong we had even considered 'Is this Women-Gone-Wild any good, funny if you will? We were struck by the recent glut of these flicks, our sounding came forth.

Let's start with Bridesmaid's, well have only seen bits of it. Ghostbusters, well, the same. Bad Neighbors 2, now here we go. We remember the first one, a funny Rose Byrne, the always good Seth Rogan & the ultra-fit Zac Efron. It had moments were genuinely funny. The sequel? We do not remember er, finishing it. Shish! Again, why do we never finish things. It might take you a moment to read this sentence. We have gone and comeback from re-watching Bad Neighbors 2, just to...refresh memory? Are you buying that? We shall return, like Superman (only better). (PS We love Brandon Ralph, either then, the 'missing years' or now!! We would R(g)AY PALMer his dick for him, we hear like Liam Neeson he has a long cock that needs rolling back up)(This job we would do).

AHEM!!

To update this current velum, we have re-watched (Bad) Neighbors 2. For some reason we assumed Drew Barrymore was in it. She isn't). After our shilly-shallying earlier we come suddenly to our review. It was....pretty, pretty good. However Seth Rogen in this film is funnier than all the other female cast members. In conclusion we suspect this was the wrong one to discuss on this subject.

Moving on didn't work for Bananarama, nor did it work for STEPS. Third time's the charm? So not actually moving on, Pitch Perfect. We really enjoyed this, Bridesmaids didn't see it all & Night at the Museum 3 we kind of liked. The Museum one isn't a 'Women-Go-Wild' film but is DOES feature Rebel Wilson. Now her, Rebel and Melissa McCarthy are the start of a perfect Wild movie recipe. Maybe with Kristan Schall and we suspect Samuel L Jackson, sounds tasty but as you can read we are not writers. BTW HOLLYWOOD JEW WRITERS GET ON BOARD, MAKE THIS!!

...BUT I THOUGHT? WELL, WHO? WHAT?

Yesterday Rubbish Gays saw this on there local Manchester Evening News website. Our first thoughts were, oh, hasn't he already? Isn't he back and forth to them like a game of ping-pong? Also, who cares? As far as we could assern our care level is at zero. News, yes, well kind of, -ish. Oh Tony, Tony, Tony...

WE HATE SEASON ENDS (BUT LOVE BELL-ENDS)

Argh, we know it's Summer. It keeps getting lighter early (curse these these thin 'curtains'). Reminding us to go to bed, not accounting for the great doom that is USA TV's various 'season finale' paths. Yes, ALL and I mean ALL of my favorite TV shows have come to an end, Quantico, The Walking Dead, Supergirl, Gotham, etc. Un-yay!! We can finally pay attention to (urgh) tennis, or (bleagh) cricket. Now we will admit some of these seasons were overly long and some had the newish dearly invention 'mid-season finale'. As far as we know our favorites haven't been canceled like

Alphas, Almost Human and our last favorite Limitless, that in itself is good news. As manufactured serendipitous as the USTV Summer line-up is, we at Rubbish Gays instantly forget about them and delighted when they toll round again. In the olden days there seemed to be just True Blood. now it's filled with a Rubbishcopia rammed with Yggaystrail. Dark Matter, Zoo and Killjoys are three that are not The Walking Dead spin-offs.

We are NOT anti-semitic but...

Let us begin earlier in the day. The Simpsons was doing a Posiden Adventure spoof. So we were but in mind of the remake, we tried to watch it once, it was too stretched, squashed, kinda Paula Abdulish. So after rush rushing to downloaded and put it on, we realized Richard Dreyfuss was in it. Hence our tag line. We assumed Richard was Jewish like Shelly Winters (If that is indeed right). As so older, Jewish, Poseidon, I thought he would play her. We remember more Bette Midler doing Shelly Winters. Anyhow, SPOILER SPACE Richard Dreyfuss does NOT play the Shelly Winters part drowning helping others. Again SPOILER SPACE he does die :(.

Poseidon as a film was on the menu. It was actually alright. Alas awful lines ahoy, "God, save our souls", said by the gay Captain from Brooklyn 99. As well as his prophetic line he also he to die in the arms of perfectly cast lounge singer Fergie. Again frowny face :(

Beauty & The Bell-End

No matter what is said, we LOVE Once Upon A Time. Having just viewed the 2-parter season finale shown Spice Girl Style, 2 Become 1, really? Toward the end we actually cried tears (from our eyes this time, not our penises as before). As we were feeling sad AND with the show in point. We realled although it's going to reboot/hash, while we braced for impact, there was NO Michael Socha. He was cast as Will Scarlett, who if we are not mistaken, never met Robin Hood on screen. Pointless. Anhyhoo, Michael was well fit in Being Human, and we didn't see that E4 alien thing he was in. We at Rubbish Gays only have one more comment for him. That other one did Poldark (again, we have never seen), but I bet he gets a bigger dressing room.

Love Dr Who, Hate Mrs Brown.

FOR THE RECORD:We entered the term 'erotic dr who' in Google images, where we found the above picture. ​

We love Dr Who and hate Mrs Brown's Saturday shite. Yes we at Rubbish Gays are stuck on the middle of our equivalent Trump vs everyone else. We cannot understand either him or the success of Mrs Brown. A mystery indeed, for modern times. The new Dr Who (you just said it), was fantastic. The aforementioned Brown has yet to come. In a side note there is some kind of gay thing going on in...Casualty.

God, we hate the Mrs Brown thing as much as Mr Khan. What kind of a world are we living in? On that TV note we do not approve of the following, NCIS:Los Angeles his reached it's EIGHT!?! season and how strong is Warren from Hollyoaks to get Bart's body up into the attic via a ladder. On the Hollyoaks theme, Adam-Fucking-Rickett's new character! We thought our eyes were smarting from something. We even had to Google the episode to see this familiar looking face, only to discover t'was him. {Shocked} He 'plays' a gay, hoorah! Alas knowing the village he will end up in bed with Ste, or James, or Duncan from Blue. Will it happen? Does the world turn? Who can say? Who knew Hollyoaks would last longer than Brookside?

Hold Your Thumb In Front Of His Face

You remember in the past we warned you about a picture (you have probably already seen by now). The previous one was H from Steps having a 6-pack in the theatrical version of Joseph & His Donovan. We already warned you? Good, in Jon from S Club 7. Yes they are gay looking one and no, it's not Paul Cattermole. Oh Jon, your body is quite impressive, however as probably pointed out before, some of your tattoos are not that good. However, we bet you are a HOT HIT on the Gridr with those as your profile pictures. BTW Hide your face, make it a nice surprise for punters.

Genuine Shite

The item above is available at ebay, for...£9.99 starting auction price. What's that? No bids? We, like Kylie were shocked by the power. We shall bring no more attention to it, other that the fact, we are now watching this 'item'. Fingers crossed, it sells?!

Mr Willis, Your Flight May Be Delayed

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Having just watched Lucky Number Sleven I was reminded AGAIN how dangerous Bruce Willis is at an airport. I thought immediately of 12 Monkeys, skipping over (how could I forget) Die Hard II. Whilst looking for a picture representing this, I came across this tit-bit, Bruce Willis' private airport plan sparks lawsuit from Idaho residents Hooray, I'm not the only one concerned. The article itself is very, very dull. Lots of babble about zoning laws breached. No fear about the residents being hijacked on a plane, etc. People of Idaho be careful!!

​ We HATE Richard Quest

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Richard Quest frontline CNN dickhead. Richard, or Dick, why are you such a douche? Rubbish Gays can only be viewed in the bedroom of Rubbish Towers, however such viewing material is sullied by unerotic, tasteless adverts with this dick. Being sure we are not the first to abore him so we googled it. Search term 'I hate Richard Quest', I was thrilled by the 1st entry.

This Richard Quest asshole on CNN!

Hoorah!

Then, only the third entry. Hallelujah:-

Richard Quest, CNN Reporter, Arrested On Drug Charges.

​ The shocking details were revealed. As we were not aware of these details we shall throw light IE state them again to renforce our point.

'Richard Quest was busted in Central Park early yesterday with some drugs in his pocket, a rope around his neck that was tied to his genitals, and a sex toy in his boot'

Hoo-fuckin-rah!! A rope?! Fnar, fnar!! Sex toy in boot?! Fnar, fnar!!

'Quest was initially busted for loitering, the source said. Aside from the oddly configured rope, the search also turned up a sex toy inside of his boot, and a small bag of methamphetamine in his left jacket pocket.'

Meth?! Fnar, fnar!!

Finally and most amusingly :-

'It wasn’t immediately clear what the rope was for.'

What a penis!! God, please smite him down. It seems the above mentioned event happened 9 years ago. Damn!! PLEASE let it happen again. In the meantime we shall go back to this heavily circulated picture of Will Young's cock. (About Will Young's cock picture, yes it's big and uncut, BUT never in a bath a selfie take). If you haven't seen it yet, here you hand see it by clicking this.

​ The Older We Get, The Younger Everyone Else Seems To Be

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Having done our casual check on Digitalspy.com, we saw the TV Flash Grant Gustin hes become engaged. What?! For a start he always appeared too young to play The Flash, late 30's we imagined The Flash should be. Anyway, this news reminded us of the great divide between the young and the old. More importantly how old WE were and how young everybody else seems to be. I loathe to use the word 'whippersnapper', however there must always be some snappering or nothing would ever get done. Madonna would be number 1, the charts would be 'The Hit Parade' and Snickers would still be called Marathon. Colton Heyes, is another TV superhero casting, he was Roy Harper 'Speedy' in Arrow. After having a few 'difficult moments on the Internet', IE I'm not saying I'm gay, but I'm not saying I'm not. Of course I am paraphrasing. However in the past weeks he too has got engaged, to a MAN??!! Hooray!! When Rubbish Gays was younger it was all, Mrs Thatcher, Clause 28 and The Age Of Consent. Thats right you had be 21 to be legally gay. Now I'm not saying Colton or Grant is 21 but it's the thin end of the wedge. EVERYONE is getting younger!! Gay Porn. Yes of course we have seen it. We are a gay after all. Twinks back in the day used to be called 'chickens', now as then, RUBBISH. apart from pervy men, who whats to look at these 'acting'. At the other end, there are too many old, ugly, mongs now in porn. This I blame on cheap, instant technology. Yes, it's great porn is free to all but should much of it be made? porngayxhubhamster.com holds delights, also much, much horror.

Make Your Own Pun

Today is the 1st of May. May rhymes with gay. We hope you, like us, have a Rubbish May. Perhaps a Rubbish (Theresa) May.

The More Things Change, The More They Stay The Same

It's 2017, Rubbish Gays has been on their first Grindr meet. There could be many reasons why the time was right, none of which are to be dwelled on here. We at Rubbish Gays were aware of all the hints n tips of a meet. Correction, we used to know how it all worked thanks to 2005-2011 Gaydar. Rubbish Gays back in the day used to um, rule Gaydar. Well, show off in the Manchester Chat/Cruising Room. In the day Rubbish Gays used to have a car & be a bit thinner, our profile would turn heads. Flash forward to last week. What could a sex/drugs be like nowadays? The arrangement, taxi & travel were very quick. First hurdle cleared. He was alright, chatty but always fiddling with his phone. He was in and out the living room, kitchen, toilet still on his phone. During all this his flat mate came in, sat down. He was fully dressed (I will mention now we were naked and nowhere near sex). Porn was on the gentlemen's HD tv, fit flat mate start to pull in his jean crotch. This he only did twice for ten seconds in two minutes. After which he left the room never to return. Meanwhile the gentleman caller we had visited earlier was still in & out of the room. Another porn was put on 'for me?'. After being left 30 minutes alone, we got dressed. After another ten minutes he came back in the room, (oddly enough bearing in mind he hasn't seen us for a while DRESSED). We asked him to call a taxi, meanwhile he was telling me some 'mates' were coming over. Looking back, it was a good idea we left. If fact it would have been better had we never went at all In conclusion there is NO difference between meets now & then, just more pictures nowadays. We thank you.